You can never tell what's to become of a situation. Things come and go, and until you can see that every situation has a passing event you can't go past it. In order for someone to truly help you, you need to figure out what you want done. What's something about the response you get, that you dread so much? Is it the fear that it truly isn't worth the care to try and take the chance to consider the help? Whatever that reason may be only you can truly change it. As lame as this may come across you are still a presence and present in time. Only you are responsible for the actions you take to try and overcome that one day. You say it isn't worth it, yet, something stops you from a major choice in your life. Whatever is stopping is your queue to look into that and look at it. That's your meaning to live and move forward.
I can't tell you what purposes we have here, whether you want to know is up to you. Yet, whatever you come across is your own idea. You make those negative ideas apart of your life. You can even make it apart of your life to move on, and look back and see what you came across.
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Shut the front door.
Holy mother of pearl