i found what i was looking for.

"maybe this summer we will meet again in chicago and i will say you look great and commend you for forcing down all those protein drinks because its really paying off and your calf muscles look amazing. We will cruise through checkers drive thru without paying, blasting jungle music. I will feed you french fries at a stop sign while you keep your knuckles clenched right and white and wrapped around the wheel. we will race down the cith streets in the dark and i will ask if you still want to hold a fashion show in an excavated church in rome with our old substitute teachers as models and you will say sure, i guess. you will make fun of my spiked bracelet and i will tell you your new nikes suck, and then we will be silent for a really long time. after a while i'll tell you isnt it crazy how quickly time goes by, and i think you were the first boy i loved, and sometimes i miss high school so much, isnt that a weird thing to say. youll mess with the dial on the radio for a while, then look out the window and say, i dont know, i try not to think about those days, and do you want me to drop you off at home now?"

every once in a while you will find someone someone new, exciting and intriguing. relationships fade, grow, die, cycle and confuse us.

sometimes the best thing to do is enjoy them. even if the chaos of one is enough to drive us mad. understand it wont be there forever. and instead of spending every ounce of emotion trying to figure it out....live it. ride every wave of uncertainty with love as a lifeboat.

in everything cliche,
HER NAME HERE

........................................................
This was the letter she wrote me just now, to end it all.

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remember live your life for love, and love because it's your life.