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*Leonidas is visiting the AA again. His alcholism has got out of hand. Here, he speaks infront of a small group of Alcoholics, wanting to "open up and release the tension within" *.  

AA Leader: ...It's your turn,Leonidas. Why are you here?

Leon: I...Im here because I drink to much alcohol. I've had a hard life.

AA Leader: Now tell us about your past.

Leon: In my home town of SPARRTAA, I like to go around, and slap the asses of the SPARRTA! - woman. I like to drink, and have wild group sex with the Oracle. Stelios, Dilios, Captain Artemis. We like to go down to the local Sparta pub, get laid, and end up having gay sex together. It's easy, you know? To get those small leather pants off them.

Leon: It all started, when a Persian Messenger stormed into our quiet little drunk Town. Woman being chased naked by older men. Punk kids lying on the ground, drunk, drinking dirty water. And Emo kids, crying. As usual. Anyway, he came and I said to him "Before you speak, Persian, know that in Sparta, everyone, even a king's messenger, are held accountable for the words of his voice. Now, what message do you bring?" "Earth and water", and I was...You know? I found this odd. "You...You rode all the way from Persia for earth and water?" My wife, that sexy little minx, said to him "Do not be coy or stupid, Persian. You can afford neither in Sparta. You must go to Tescos, or Walmart, to buy such things." ... To cut long story short, he said to me: "No man, Persian or Greek, no man threatens a messenger" "You bring the crowns and heads of conquered kings to my city's steps. You insult my queen. You threaten my people with slavery and death! Oh, I've chosen my words carefully, Persian. Perhaps you should have done the same.", and that is when I got angry, you see? I took out my plastic Sword, and pointed to him, yelling "Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!!!", kicking him into the sandpit.  

*the AA clap and cheer*

AA Leader: Well done. Next...

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Discuss.

Post edited at 5:23 am on Aug. 30, 2008 by Rtheory

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